Dear Raina,
Sol says one cannot accomplish anything while sitting on the fence. I think he means that you won't really help either way if you don't decide where you stand and you may do more harm than good by staying out of it. So, in short, I think you need to make a decision. I can't make it for you, but if you were to ask my opinion I would say, hop into the Rebellion and make a difference. The people are good and the cause worthy of your allegiance. And besides, there's always Ranger. That should be a big factor. If it's any help, I'm all for it. The Rebellion, not you and Ranger. Well, you and Ranger too, but that's not what I initially meant.
Love seems to be the common topic of life. I think I mentioned earlier that Benk and I'talia have a bit of an understanding and I would have to state now that it is more than a bit. Remember when I used to think that Gi was I'talia's suitor? Well, I can't fully explain his actions but he doesn't remember much and it must have been Y'ata or the King controlling him. So no worries there. Gi couldn't be happier for them.
I really like I'talia. She is a very honest person and that is so refreshing! We haven't gotten a whole ton of time to talk, and she hasn't been able to tell me much more than what Gi already has. She can't really say whether or not her brother has much control over what he does but she is voting that he is mostly innocent. She has met Y'ata a couple of times and been rightly disgusted at those meetings. But for the most part she is as in the dark as we all are. She knows of M'oren and Zel but has never heard of Luc.
But, boring news behind us, we are all doing rather well. We have had a few surprise visits from our old friend Weed and miraculously been led away from a possible capture or discovery. He is a wonderful creature and I am most grateful to him for his help. He is gone now but I am certain he will show again some time soon.
I guess we are kind of heading towards the Rebellion now. The going is slow but we'll be there eventually. In the meantime, I don't mind the time I get to spend with my friends. It's so good to have Benk back with me and we enjoy reminiscing about the old, innocent days in Warrior Training. He is such a sweetheart and I am so happy for him and I'talia.
Sol babbles endlessly, but you already knew that. Nothing new in that area.
As for Gi, well, let me narrate.
Last night we said our fond goodbyes to Weed and he shambled off into the darkness. The moon was as bright as can be and the night was clear and warm. Benk and I'talia walked off alone to do whatever lovers do, and Sol reluctantly left the warmth of the fire for the intellectual warmth of a book he had found lying by the highway. As shocked as he was at such abuse of potential wisdom, he picked the tome up and keeps it near him night and day. At least he can't talk so much while he reads.
Gi and I sat by the flickering flames and commented on this or that happenstance of our travels.
We eventually moved to the hard ground to wrestle with our hands. He held mine in his a moment longer than was needful and I felt the old burning sensation begin in my stomach. But, needless to say, I don't think it was due to magic.
We giggled uncomfortably and sat again on the fallen log. But the burning continued even as I tried to shake it off. I stood to go, intent on clearing my now so foggy head.
Before I had made it three steps, his arms were around me, pulling me swiftly to the ground. The fight lasted less than a minute and ended with two rather swollen noses and a slightly twisted ankle on his side.
We lay on the ground panting and groaning in delight, the stars overhead echoing our sparkling happiness.
"Ugh." I said, commenting on the fact that Gi was rolling on top of me and leaving me gasping for air. He stopped midway in his roll and stared down at my dust covered face.
Before I could say chickens chuckle chillingly, his lips found mine and you can guess what ensued.
Out of mind and out of breath, he pulled me to my feet and we sat again on the fallen log, this time his arm fitting comfortably around my shoulders as my head rested against him.
His voice drifted soothingly on the dark night and I could feel his breath against my hair.
"Tair, I'm pretty sure I love you." I didn't reply and he shifted so he could see my reaction in the moonlight. "Hey," he whispered. "what do you have to say to that?" His voice was teasing but my thoughts and feelings were suddenly deep in the depths of doubt.
"I don't know." My voice was surprisingly cold and I couldn't stop myself from sitting up and pushing his arm away. He looked surprised and studied my face, surely looking for a sign that I was merely joking.
Raina, I loved the kiss, I loved his arm around me, I love being with him, and I may even love him, but I just can't do it again. I may not have written you everything, but I had feelings for Luc. And it hurt. It hurt, Raina. I got really hurt. For once I thought maybe something would work out and that he really liked me too and he was so good and wonderful and almost everything I ever wanted and I got hurt and I can't do it right now.
I'm sorry. I don't know why I feel like I need to make these excuses to you. I just want you to understand and I know you must. I am so happy for you and Ranger and I wish you the best of the best, but I can't wish the same for myself at this very moment.
Gi is wonderful and I really like him but not right now.
Sorry to load this on you.
Anyway, I tried to explain things to Gi but it didn't come out right. We both stomped away in anger and I couldn't bring myself to try to talk to him again.
By my lance, I didn't think it would be this bad! I asked myself what I would do if something like this happened but it didn't turn out the way I planned. Ugh, not to be all mushy or anything, but I can't stop myself from thinking back to that oh so heavenly kiss and the battle march beating in my chest when his lips first touched mine.
Dang! I really wish you were with me and I could just talk to you in person! You know what I'm trying to say but I just can't write it right!
Ugh.
I love you dearly and can't wait to see you when I reach the Rebellion!
All the best of luck!
Yours,
Tair
P.S.
The sun is shining brightly on this oh so delectable morning and my thoughts are soaring on the wings of the eagle overhead.
Although Gi and I have not brought up the conversation of two nights past, we have ventured to speak to one another a time or two and I must admit that he is still so very good to me. But that is not what I am writing to you about.
Raina, I don't know if I actually believe it yet, but my dear dear friends could actually be alive! And even more likely, they could be somewhere in the Rebellion!
Gi tells me of the gossip he picks up in the towns he goes to for supplies and the latest is of a band of three Warriors meeting at this very town the very month they were said to have died. Their descriptions fit Abe, Terk and Kira so well that I could almost see them right before my eyes as Gi was telling me. But best of all, my dearest friends left me a clue!
The blacksmith here is a perfect mute and a dear one at that. The sword I have been using is borrowed and bent and it has been getting on my nerves. So I couldn't help but go into town myself and see what the blacksmith had on hand.
The moment I walked in, he rushed into the adjoining room and quickly returned with a beautifully engraved sword that nearly matched the brightness of my shining eyes. I don't know for certain how he knew who I was but I suppose it cannot be that hard to recognize a tall woman with a nearly permanent weapons display hooked to her back. I took the sword in hand and let myself heft it around, feeling the perfect fit as I gripped it around the hilt. The sparkle of the sun caught the words etched in it at just the right angle and I nearly dropped the sword in astonishment. For right on that beautiful sword, written for all who would see, were these glorious and magnificent words: The Amazing Unstoppable Five.
Can anything be plainer? The blacksmith insisted that it had already been paid for by the one he described as the "giant" and that I was to take it and fight.
Dear girl, please look for them! You cannot imagine what good it would do my heart to know that they live still and that I can see them so soon! Do write me and let me know what you find! I cannot wait!
