40

Dearest sister I'taira,

How could I do anything but forgive you? I have longed, and hoped, that you had not died. I missed you so much. It was almost unbearable at times. I must admit though that when I first received you letter I debated whether I would burn it or not. I was afraid, of what I don't know. Maybe I was afraid of the truth. But I'm so glad that I didn't burn it. Before I continue on about other news I need to tell you why things happened the way they did. When the Mage council appeared I didn't know what to think. Then they started blaming you. I didn't know how to react. Forgive me for being so stubborn on that cliff I should have let you explain everything to me. But when I saw you fall off the cliff I so stunned that I couldn't move. Then the council got all mad and said that we, (Ranger and I) should have search parties sent out to find you. I refused and said that the evidence was clear that you had died. The Mage council doesn't really like me. I found out that they hated our father because he had so much magical power that they were jealous. I suppose being his daughters they naturally don't like us too much. And they hate you because they think you murdered Weed. Then they get mad at me because I was the only one brave enough to stand up to Y'ata. All in all I wish they would leave. But they have to stay. And about your banishment I really am sorry. It was either banish you or let them burn the place of your marriage and any remains that they could find, also allowing them to continue searching for you. Both Ranger and I decided it was best to banish you. I'm sorry but the council wouldn't have it any other way.

Now to move on to more pleasing things I'll update you on all your friends. Kira and Terk, they have four children, three daughters and one son. Bud and Luc have five children, they've been very busy. They had one pare of triplets. Bud is still a pleasure to have around and makes us all laugh. Then Benk and I'talia have one girl and one boy. Right now they are on the high seas checking on our foreign relations. Emlyn has recently been married to Abe's younger brother. Emlyn felt awful about liking him at first but then I told her that Abe wouldn't want her to become an old maid. She got married a month later. They all have their homes stationed near the palace. You would love the palace. It's so open and the sun is always shining through it. We built it on top of the rebellion caves. We then closed off the caves and those are where we have our prisons. But the open village area is now the capitol of I'ikane. It's much larger than H'lafa. All the Lords and Ladies have moved up here and now have a very busy court. Ranger finds it dull and I find it utterly pointless yet we have to affiliate with the court more than we would like. Every one still loves Ranger. He is probably the most respected person in the world. He and I still go out once a week to smaller villages and help others. Oh and aunt and uncle have moved back to our old village and live there in peace.

I suppose you have been wondering about my family. Well I wasn't at all surprised that you have heard about my eldest daughter, A'naraTair. She is the perfect princess. She has more courtly manners than Ranger and I could ever hope for. But she isn't the courts perfect idea of a lady. You see in her spare time she practices sword fighting, dagger combat and throwing, fist-fight training, cavalry and learning how to shoot a bow and arrow. Though the court doesn't know she does this. They just think she is the beautiful princess of I'ikane. She looks a lot like you. She's very lovely. After all she is named after you. She was destined to be good fighter, even at her young age of almost seven. Emlyn thinks that we should arrange a marriage for our daughter. I refused and said that I wouldn't punish my daughter that way but Emlyn said that when she gets older she'll attract every Lord with in five months traveling distance. I still refuse. I would hate to have marriage forced upon me, and I'm sure my daughter would too. Well unfortunately we have to call her A'nara so that the Mage council doesn't get too mad.

Then there is our less known son Dainen. He's a very quite, reflective person, he's five. He loves studying war tactics and also enjoys training with his sister. He's very intelligent but talks rarely. He and I often go walks in the palace gardens and we talk together. He and I are close. I hate to admit it but I talk to Dainen more than my other children. But I suppose that's alright. I do spend most of my time with my children teaching them and what not. But Ranger spends more time with A'nara than I do.

Then there is our last son, the trouble maker, S'oturi. We all call him Ri (he's sort of named after Gi and Master S'oturi). I hope that Ri never meets Aberey and Terken. They would bring down the whole world. Ri is three also. He gets a strange thrill in causing trouble. The other day I found the cooks screaming because some how my little Ri had managed to sneak in two snakes. I have no idea where gets his sense of distruction. The whole Mage council has determined that my children our a hopeless case. They had hope in A'nara until she declared that her aunt I'taira was her role model, and that she was determined to turn out just like you. Then they thought Dainen would be someone Ranger and I could really be proud of. But then he wouldn't talk to them and when he did he . . . insulted them in a very sly manner. And Ri they find an embarrassment. So they decided that out of all our hopeless children A'nara would be the best choice for them to train in their ways of knowledge. She has lessons with them every week and she hates them. When she gets to the family living areas of the palace she tells us all their faults in teaching and their wrongs and her deep dislike. Ranger and I say nothing because in all honesty we agree with her. Ranger has another council which he picked half the men and then the people elected the other half. And he prefers that council.

I don't know if you've heard but the Sages are starting to lose their foresight. Sol was the first one to tell us of this. He said that he can't understand why its happening. Sol misses you. He knew that Weed was going to have someone kill him that day. But Sol hopped that he wouldn't die. But when he found out that Weed had chosen you to do it, he sorrowed. I know this because he told me. He tried to have the council disband the law of killing the person who killed the Ajitar, but they refused. He now understands that most Ajitars choose their way to die. And he feels that the Mage council has killed many innocent people because of their beliefs. All of us don't like the Mage council. I mean they don't even have power any more. I've tried to have them disbanded but it hasn't happened yet. I wish there was some way I could see you again. It makes me so mad that I was ever angry with you. I had long ago forgiven you but it still hurt me that you died not knowing how I really felt.

I get so side tract when writing you. There is so much I want to say but I really don't want to say it all in one letter. But when I told my daughter about you still being alive she was so happy and over joyed. She said she would love to write to Rayna. A'nara is keeping this secret of your existence so well. Ranger confides in A'nara more than he confides in his councilors. She is probably the most trust worthy person in the whole palace. She is very excited to write to her cousin.

I pray that maybe one day I will be able to see you again. And that our families will meet. Though we'd better bring ropes to tie up our trouble makers, if our families ever meet. I long to meet your children. Especially the one that has melted your heart. Ranger sends his love and deepest regret for how things have turned out. I want you to know that I love you. I didn't want you to die on that day so long ago and it still hurts my pride that I didn't stand up for you. I will only tell a few people of your existence though. I don't want too many people knowing.


I keep feeling like something is coming. Something that will make this people be more than what they think they are. Make this world a better place. But its just a feeling.


Love for ever and always,

Raina.

39

Dear Ishraina,

Contain your shock on hearing from me. I am alive and well. I will come to more recent news after I go through past and painful events.

This letter may or may not please you, but I can no longer stand the silence I have been forced in to. I only hope you can put aside your own prejudices and have an open mind as I lay before you my part of that fateful day so long ago and the events shortly thereafter.

 When Gi first urged me to tell you of the part I played and all I saw, I could not bring myself to say the words or even attempt to write them and I was uncertain as to how you would react on hearing from me, not knowing whether or not that would put me in any danger. But I feel as if these six years have given me more than sufficient time to think on the past and I can only hope that any danger from yourself is long gone.

 I didn't feel as if any but myself should bear the burden of those memories. I see things sufficiently different now to try to lay before you the events of that awful day. You were so engrossed in your own battle that you could hardly have taken the time to witness the goings on around you. Bear with the details and whims of my writing. I only try to let you see things the way I did.  

 What I did that day, is done and I cannot regret my actions. Judge me how you will. I have accepted my banishment but you must know I cannot accept your personal judgement to me without knowing you are aware of my every reason and thought. 

 I will begin at the time I received your last letter. 

The camp was in confusion and it took me hours to make my way to Ranger to relay your simple message. But when I at last found our leader in council, I saw the strength he gained from your words along with the sorrow that caused his shoulders to droop. 

Detachments of men and weapons were being sent out by the minute and I soon found myself leading my small force. They were brave and ready and the message of the approaching army began to stir my soul, filling me with desire to show my valor in combat.

In the rush of our advancement, I found Gi by my side. He took me from my horse and I was soon facing him in his own saddle. He brought me fiercely to him and I found my desires of fighting gone with the wind and myself wanting nothing but to stay in his arms. He kissed my forehead and with his voice full of unknown passion asked me to marry him. 

I agreed but acknowledged that it was a strange time to be asking. He laughed huskily and kissed the words out of my lips. But before he would put me back in my command, he compelled me to make an oath that I would not go back on my promise to him. His face was so serious that I could do nothing but agree. After the blood on our hands mingled together with the oath-words on our lips, he put me back on my horse and galloped into the crowd of warriors. 

The thought of my engagement was heavy on my mind and I found the desire of being in Gi's arms still strong in my heart. When the call came for us to go, I glanced back with regret at Gi standing near Ranger. I blew my fiance a kiss and he caught it in his hand with a grip of iron. 

We met the enemy in a short skirmish which proved to be nearly fatal for me. Master Gann was leading the skirmishers and it fell to my lot to battle him. I know not whether he was under Y'ata's influence, but his power was greater than I remembered and before long I took a stab to the side. 

Dear Abe was with me and faithfully returned me to safety. I don't think I will ever forget the look on Gi's face when he first saw me. If grief were ever shown so fully on a man's face, it was on his. But the grief was mostly dispelled after Bud came. Her powers may be less than yours but they were in high demand that day. Her trick of healing cured me as well as could be hoped in the moment but still Gi and Ranger denied my pleas of going out more that day. 

Gi escorted me to the make-shift hospital and with a kiss and a tear went off to take command of my own force. 

I was raging with anger and resentment but it was mostly dispelled in an hour's work of caring for the wounded. 

Skirmishes were going on constantly but there was still no news of the main force of the enemy. 

Night was coming on and I found myself drifting to the outer edges of safety. I felt your call in my mind, unconscious as it may have been on your part, and I knew you were drawing near. 

When I gained the advantage of higher ground, I drew a great breath at the sight before me. 

The blurs of men and horses spanned the horizon and I thought pitifully of the fact that our men were only a small portion of that vast valley of army. The skirmishers were holding the front line but it would not be long before our main forces were matched in battle.

I shaded my eyes from the glare of the setting sun and searched for your figure in the crowd. After a moments search, I saw the tell-tale signs of private combat. From my viewpoint, there was a wide circle about you and Y'ata, men fighting around but unconsciously making room for the fateful battle in their midst. I could not see the details of what was going on but it seemed to me as if time stood still and neither of you gained in your final battle ground. 

I searched for signs of my friends and most especially of my fiance, but the tears in my eyes blurred my vision and even if my sight had been clear, everything was so far away that I was almost entirely detached from that awful scene of death.

I felt the tears start to caress my cheek and I brushed angrily away at them, confused at my strong emotions. I felt something brush against my leg and I looked down to find dear old Weed near my side. He sidled up against me and I reached down to scratch his head. His breath whispered hot on my hand and I sat down as he nestled in my lap. I began to speak aloud, anxious for some breeze of clarity in my emotion-troubled heart. 

"Ah Weed..." I breathed his name and he looked up at me, cocking his head to one side as if he understood my need for talking. "Look at it all. All the terror and pain going on down there. And then up here, it seems so... detached. So non-emotional. It's as if one can look down and wonder what it's all for. Why do men gather on a field to destroy? If they could only... look up. If they could only see what I see from up here." My voice caught as my eyes rested on the faraway places, nearly blotting the scene of carnage out. "Look," I pointed to a distant spot, squinting my eyes to see through the haze of the sunset. "there's Mount D'iai, and you can see the lake at the bottom sparkling. And over there is the Desert H'azi. See how they are right next to each other and yet they are so opposite. How does that work? And once you get past the desert, there's another and even grander mountain, Mount Zahi and then another and even more desolate desert. And then even further is the ocean. And you can keep going on that ocean until it brings you full circle back here, to this war-ridden place. This hell-hole of a kingdom that defies what nature teaches around it. How can it be that a desert and an ocean can live side by side, neither one crossing the bounds of the other, and yet people, intelligent human beings cannot exist in the same fertile land without reaching across to snatch away what it rightfully another's?" 

My voice was growing hysterical and Weed rubbed against my agitated hand, bringing me back to the present. My voice grew soft again and I struggled to not choke against the sorrow. 

"I just don't know what it's all for anymore. Ugh! All my life I've thought of the "task" I was to do, the one great thing that would be so hard and yet so worth it. What could be better than saving my kingdom, what could be harder? And yet," my eyes widened at the thought. "and yet, none of it seems to matter anymore. I don't... care." 

My words came quicker as I voiced my feelings and my breath began to come in great gasps as I struggled to find the meaning of my thoughts. 

"What am I doing? Why am I even here?" I laughed sarcastically through my tears. "I started this all and yet now I realize I really did nothing to help. Raina is the one who did it all, and Ranger. I can take no credit either way, and yet this is what I was supposed to do! I was locked up in that horrid prison while Raina fulfilled my destiny!" My voice was rising and I shook Weed off my lap as I got up to pace around the small grass-covered area. "What am I supposed to do?!" I screamed the questions to the heavens, as if the Sage of my youth would appear and clarify his fateful words. I don't even remember what else I said, my voice was screeching with pain and anger and I could no longer hold back the sobs that shook my shoulders. My thoughts were spinning in circles and for a moment I wished I were down on that battlefield, where someone could rightly take away my life and I would no longer have to live with this pain. 

I felt such anger against you that I daren't even try to explain it. For the longest time I had thought my destiny was to be a part of the Rebellion and do exactly what you had done. I realized in a sudden moment that everything I had wanted to be, you had become. And everything I thought I was supposed to do, was all done by you. You had taken what, up to that point, had been my life and I couldn't let go of the feeling of betrayal inside me.

There I sat, alone on that rise of ground, while you fought as the savior of the Rebellion, everyones hopes and dreams pinned to you, while I was unable to even make the slightest difference due to my injury. 

My sobs eventually wearied me and I sank to the ground, my face covered with my hands and my shoulders nearly touching the hard earth. 

When I had quieted my display of emotion, I felt rather than heard a voice whisper to my mind, such words that had they been said out loud were surely have come out in an extremely sarcastic tone of voice but echoed in my mind were mingled with a calmer and sweeter feeling.

"Are you quite finished?" 

My reactions were doomed to be slow and I sat staring ahead of me, in vain trying to reason with myself that my conscience had not suddenly chosen this time to awake. 

The voice "ahhemmed" in my head and I slowly twisted my position so as to have a full view of my solitary companion on the hill. 

Weed had risen on his hind legs and his head was cocked to the side in his usual knowing look.

"Excuse me?" I said in a weak voice, knowing I must have looked the complete dolt with my face tear-streaked, my clothes blood-stained, and talking aloud to an animal known to be eternally silent. 

"That's better. Now,"  He continued to speak in my mind as he circled around me, as if to ascertain that I had stopped crying. "I had not thought explaining things to you would prove to be so difficult but it appears as if you are going to want to know a lot. 

"To begin with, you had best stop bemoaning your negligence of the Rebellion and see things a bit more clearly. One person does not fulfill another's destiny. If you have neglected to do something and Raina does it in your place, it automatically becomes Raina's destiny, for good or for worse. You forfeit your destiny only once and then it is lost forever, to be replaced with a new destiny. Humans have a nearly endless supply of destinies and are certain to go through a good amount of them before their existence ends." Weed sat across from me, making it so that if I looked over his shoulder I had a good view of the ever increasing battle below. 

The Ajatair gave me a sort of smile and I almost laughed at the sight. "But things are different in your case." His voice softened noticeably and I felt my tension begin to release. "I'taira, the Rebellion was never your destiny to lose. Misled thoughts and ideas have led you to believe that the Sage Yored meant you to lead your kingdom away from destruction. An honorable thought it might have been, but nevertheless, not for you." There was a moment of silence and I felt Weed waiting for me to ask him to continue. 

"Then what am I to do?" I asked, my voice shaky from so many alternating emotions. 

"Hm..." Weed remained silent but in the time of solitude in my mind, I felt it, of itself, reach back into my memories and pull forward one that has always been so callously skimmed over. I will lay it before you, as I have never truly told you of my conversation so long ago with the Sage Yored. 

My mind took me back to the old wood behind Aunt and Uncle's old cabin and as I ran along the old dirt path I glimpsed signs of my school play mates running through the trees. 

My dress caught on a protruding bush and I stumbled in my hasty flight. I felt the fear and excitement as I led myself away from the other children, determined to win the game of hiding and seeking. 

But a new fear arose in my breast the longer I ran along the old familiar path. I found myself uncertain of my whereabouts and I came to a halt. My breath came in great heaves of air as I studied the trees and rocks about me. I could no longer hear the whispers and giggles of my friends and I saw no sign of the red schoolhouse. 

But it was not in my nature to cry and so I continued to walk about, searching for anything even remotely familiar. 

I could see my breath in the chill air and I began to fear that I would freeze to death before I ever found my way back. With this thought in my mind, I sat down against the trunk of a crumbling tree and set to trying not to cry. 

My efforts were interrupted by a hand on my shoulder and I sprang to my feet in a defensive gesture. 

I faced the old man who had dared to touch me and I took great pains to show that I was in control of the situation. I saw before me nearly the exact likeness of Sol, although at the time the face was a complete stranger to me. The only difference to Sol was the dark hair chopped short about the face. His staff was made of the familiar rubber and wrapped about with green ribbon. 

The more I studied this figure of a man, the less I feared him. His smile was contagious and before I knew it, my arms had relaxed and I had allowed the old man to approach me. 

"Warrior I'taira." The old man bowed in respect and I lifted my brows. I was uncertain as to whether he was teasing me or in earnest. All of my friends had found the idea of me being a Warrior laughable and I had only been teased and mocked for my desires. But this old man had no trace of a joke about him and I could not help but lift my head at the term.

"Sage...?" My manners kicked in and I in turn bowed to him. 

"Yored." His voice was smiling now. "But names are of no matter, at least not in my case. You, however, are a different story. Little one, remember, your name will be had for right and wrong throughout this land someday. Beware how you use it."

I shrugged my shoulders noncommittally and bit down on the piece of bark I had been playing with before Yored showed up. 

An animal slithered through the trees above and a shiver ran down my spine. 

"Oh yes of course, I'll be right along." Yored spoke to the animal but I could get no definitive look at it. The Sage turned again to me and came closer. I backed away in fear but his smile calmed my nerves. 

"My dear little child," He traced my young cheek with his hand and studied my eyes. "though you may not like to hear it, I have come to ask you to do something for me." I grimaced and he laughed softly. "I am well aware of the fact that you detest being told what to do, but this is very important. This is so important that only you can do it for me. In fact, if you don't do it, it's very likely that your whole kingdom will suffer for it." I watched him closely now, always silent but showing through my expressions that I thought him in jest. 

He motioned for me to come closer and when I was just beside him, he knelt on the forest floor and whispered in my ear. "I'taira, one day you must kill for this world." My eyes went wide and my childish imagination began to soar. "Little one, there is something so closely connected with the people of this kingdom, that they cannot find fault with it. And yet that something is deadly to them. You must take it away." These last words were as harsh as he had been thus far and I felt the first inkling of fear enter my innocent heart. Not of him, but of his words. 

"How? What am I supposed to take away?" My voice felt smaller than ever but Yored clasped my small hand in his large one. 

He continued as if I had not asked the question. "There will be those that will hate you for what you have done." My hand began to shake in his and he rubbed it softly. "But you must not fear them or hate them for what they feel. They cannot understand. They will not understand." His eyes went to a spot behind my shoulder but I dared not turn to look, afraid of what I might see. 

The only real emotion in my heart was that of fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of myself. 

"What if I can't do it?" It took me a moment of indecision to voice my question but I was glad I did. 

Yored stood up and began to pace around the small enclosure of trees, rubbing his forehead occasionally and looking at me with all the thoughtfulness that becomes a sage. 

He began to speak but stopped himself, searching for the right words. He came closer and as he did so my present mind on the hill of the battlefield began to leave that small forest and Yored's voice was replaced with Weed's, retelling the last few moments of my visit that night so long ago.

"The old sage knelt before the small girl, taking her hands in his own scarred ones. 'Most of us are called on to perform tasks far beyond what we can do. Our capabilities seldom match our aspirations, and we are often woefully unprepared. For each of us comes a time when we must be more than what we are.' And with that, the old man vanished in the chill night air, leaving behind a small child with a great task." 

The Ajatair's words echoed in my mind and I found myself once again mind and body on the hill above the battlefield.

"Those words used to scare me." I whispered as Weed continued to watch me. "But then at times they would give me some kind of strength that I didn't know I had." My soul was calm and as I spoke I felt a new sense of peace in what I was figuring out. "For years I searched for what I must do. And I thought I found it, in the Rebellion. Everything Yored said fit so perfectly with my ideas that I didn't even think to cross question them. But now..." I let the thought dangle and sighed heavily. "I guess I just don't know." This time the thought was less painful and more hopeful, reminding me that there was still much I could do.

"I'taira," Weed's voice was soft in my head. "you must do it now." The Ajatair's head whipped around to gaze down at the fatal field below. "Time grows short."

"But what? What must I do?" I felt the frustration begin to rise again and I tried to shove it away. "Stop speaking in riddles. Stop acting like I know what you're talking about." Weed stared at me calmly. "Just tell me what I need to do." I tried to control the words but they tumbled out as the dam of patience broke inside me. 

"Close your eyes." I obeyed the creature's command and I found my mind taken away with his words.  

"In the beginning of what is and was, the Sage Yorenae ruled what you know as your World. Wisdom reigned and with it came great knowledge." As he spoke I saw images flash before my mind.  Images of faces unknown to me and places I had only seen in storybooks. The world I saw was pure and beautiful, untouched by the mean inventions of our day.

"The Elders Council had bestowed upon them great treasures and magics from the One who created them. The Elders judged and guided with fairness and justice and the common people lived peacefully, content in their goodness and humility.

"But like in recent times, goodness is often compromised by greed and selfishness. There was a brother sage,a leader in the Council of the Elders, one called Laedn. Overcome by a passion unknown to this world, Laedn allowed his rash emotions to take control of his actions. He deceived his brother Elders in the council and stole away with great secrets. With his treasure of knowledge and the workings of Yorenae's magic, he took it upon himself to create a new magic, a power that differed in many ways from the real thing but that convinced others they could use what had only been bestowed upon the Elders. 

"Yorenae's sorrow was great indeed, and when the people rose up in rebellion against his rule, he knew it was time for him to leave the world he had so lovingly nurtured. He spoke many words of peace to his brothers in council but not all listened. Many took heed to the lies of Laedn and questioned why there was a separation in the knowledge and magics. They began to believe that Yorenae was selfishly keeping back secrets of magic and that they had the right to hold such responsibilities as he did. 

"Laedn found his greatest allies in the common people though. When they were told of the great powers the Elders possessed, they longed for such things themselves. They questioned Yorenae, urging him to give up his reign and his powers and divide them amongst the people.  Yorenae did what he could to answer their questions and quell their arguments, but they did not really want to know the truth, therefore they could not really understand.

"But Yorenae understood the nature of the world he had ruled, so when he deemed it best to leave, he left behind him a protection and an aid against the times to come. He counseled the Ajatair's and as they possessed the same wisdom as the Sages, they accepted his counsel humbly. Yorenae ruled that there would be one Ajatair to keep watch on the human race at any given time. With the single Ajatair he left the powers he himself carried. 

"He knew that he could not come to rule again until time had fulfilled it's purpose. For years he had sorrowed with the knowledge he possessed but he could not reject it's truth.

 "Until the people gained the knowledge and wisdom of the Elders they could never be allowed the same privileges and responsibilities.

 "Yorenae gave direction to the Ajatair's and they have ever followed it. Times may come and go in this world when Laedn's magics will help and keep the human race, but until a time when the people use justly what they are given, their power will not be lasting. 

"Yorenae left the people, and in his place the Ajatair's have watched over this cruel and inhuman world ever since.

"Time after time, followers of Laedn have restored the magic, and for some years it does much good. But when corruption sets into the nature of a people, the magic itself is corrupted.

"When that time comes, the solitary Ajatair must destroy the magic." The words faded into the darkness of my mind. 

"But how?" 

Weed still stood on his back legs and I felt small in his presence, slight as his body may have been, the new knowledge he had given me filled me with respect. 

The Ajatair broke eye contact and twisted his head back to watch the nearly forgotten combat below. "'I'taira, you must kill for this world.'" The quoted words of Yored seemed to literally strike me in the heart and I struggled to breath. 

"What must I do?" I dared not say what I knew it to be. 

Silence reigned and I bowed my head as the tears filled my eyes. 

The Ajatair laid himself down on the hard earth, his head resting on his small paws. I could no longer see those knowing eyes and I was glad of it. 

At that moment I longed to be anywhere else but where I was, doing anything else. The fateful moment of my life had come and I began to shy away from it. If only it could wait! If only I had more time to prepare myself. I wasn't ready. My mind rebelled against the thought of the task before me and I felt my body follow it's lead, scooting away from the now motionless form of the creature before me. 

I lifted my head and frantically searched the battlefield for any sign of you, angry at myself for forgetting you for so long and only hoping you were still alive. 

 The moment I began searching for you, squinting to see through the dusk, Weed entered my mind once more and allowed me to see through his magically enhanced eyes. 

The sight I witnessed horrified me and I nearly turned away, but I was spellbound by the eternally momentous events happening so quickly one after the other. 

I saw you as safe as could be expected in your own battle and I turned my eyes to the figure of King Gioto on his great stallion. I watched his noble figure and found distinct traces of Ranger. He was clearly well-trained although his tactics were rather brash and often ill-timed. 

His brashness was ill rewarded though and I watched as he fell to the ground, death overtaking him before my very eyes. 

Weed's sight led me to the near figure of the daughter of M'oren, Zel. Her queenly robes were wrapped about her tightly and she fought heroically beside her deceased husband. It took moments of painful agony for her mind to connect with the fact of his death, and when I saw clearly the realization in her eyes, I could not help but want to reach out to her, her face nearly mirroring the deathly pallor of Gioto's. 

She struggled through the crowd to the battle between Y'ata and yourself. You, being momentarily detained by other Warriors, were out of Y'ata's reach and Zel grabbed frantically at his sleeve, pulling him to her level, shouting the words I could not make out through the tumult of the battle.  I guessed she was notifying him of the King's death but the news seemed to have little effect on the Mage. He shook her off and yelled out the cry to continue. 

I watched Zel's figure as her shoulders sagged in horror at Y'ata's complacency. But as quickly as the pain crossed her features, it was replaced with a passionate anger. The knife in her shaking hand rose high above her head and I felt certain Y'ata was doomed to a sudden and unforeseen death. 

But the hand bringing destruction to Y'ata was stopped mid-strike. I shifted my vision to watch M'oren restrain her vengeful daughter. 

The poor queen had tears of anger streaming down her face and she struggled against her mother to reach the cause of her bitter sorrow. But all in vain. 

My face must have mirrored the pain etched in Zel's face as she pushed herself away from her mother, stumbling back against an enemy sword, killing her instantly. But the pain and utter grief that showed on M'oren's white face nearly took my breath away. She screamed breathlessly and drew her own knife to her heart, following the horrid fate of her beloved child. 

I did not notice the tears clogging my vision for I could see clearly through the vision of Weed, but I felt my throat constrict and lightly sensed my trembling hands. 

But what I witnessed next, even brings tears to my eyes at this very moment. I again searched for you in the crowd and I caught sight of my dear friend Abe by your side. He fought as valiantly as any famed hero and more so for he was hopelessly outnumbered in defending you as Y'ata came to make battle once more. 

I saw rather than heard him call out your name in warning. He jumped to the spot you had just occupied and as you ran towards Y'ata, he held back the multitude of anxious Warriors intent on your destruction.

His head turned away for a split moment and in that fatal second, I felt my heart stop, echoing the silence of Abe's own dear, heart. His tall body fell to the ground in a heap and was soon trampled by the rushing Warriors. 

The face of Emlyn, a few yards off, just where Abe had turned to look, was white with horror and her mouth hung open in a wrenching scream of anguish. She rushed to Abe's side, heedless of the multitude of enemy soldiers, literally falling to his side and pulling his head into her lap, the over-due tears bathing his face. I struggled to wrench my eyes away from the sight, but Weed's magic held me there. And for one glorious moment, I thought there was still hope for my dear friend. He gasped with life anew, eyes flying open and catching onto the face of Emlyn above him, as if that look alone could save his dying body. But the moment passed as quickly as it had come and the only sign of his moment of life, was the smile anew on his face, the look of eternal contentment and bliss.

For a moment it seemed as if time truly stood still and now I could not help but notice the rivers of water tumbling down my cheeks and into my lap, my entire body shaking uncontrollably and my heart still silent as my friend's upon the field. 

I gasped for air, sucking in the precious life that had so cruelly been denied Abe, and my mind was drawn away from the field. Weed still lay before me, immobile and silent. 

"Why!?" I tried to scream the word but it came out in a breathless whisper. 

But without an answer, Weed's sight took me back to the scene of the crime. 

I now focused on you and Y'ata, fearfully engaged in a close battle. I watched you heave for breath and mutter incantations and swing your sword with every last bit of strength you possessed. But for all your efforts, it seemed to have little effect. The soldiers around you beat you back into a small circle as you battled with Y'ata. 

Weed's voice again entered my mind, even as I tried to shun it. 

"It is time, Warrior I'taira. Even in this very moment your destiny may pass you by. You must do it." I felt the firmness in Weed's words but still I could not do it. 

Every moment seemed to last an eternity and with each step Y'ata gained towards you, I lost a bit of my heart, fearing I could not do it. The fear in my heart was overwhelming.

Sol's words entered my mind at this precious time and I found myself almost smiling with the remembrance of his endless lectures. 'Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.' 

The simple words gave me strength and I watched you with new heart. But the small heart I had gained was nearly taken away as your sword was knocked to the ground, out of your reach. As your body refused to move, I felt every ounce of my own fighting the urge to run down to you. 

When Y'ata stood over you, his mocking laughter echoing through the ranks of watching men, my heart seemed to burn within me, closing out all thoughts but that of what I must do. 

Y'ata raised his long sword high in the air and the small knife in my hand shook with the force of my grip. 

Thoughts and images flew through my mind, blocking out the carnage around me. But this time the thoughts were my own, unsolicited by Weed. 

I pictured you in all your glory. The time you battled the Magic Master's apprentice at Warrior Training, your skills far beyond the pathetic man pitted against you. I imagined you in all you glory as I had yet to see you, I felt your thrills and passions as you used the magic within you. I remembered the times we spoke together as children, our fanciful dreams and the outcomes since. I listed in my head those I knew and was closely connected with that lived by magic. The great good that magic has done for our kingdom cannot be denied. But the evil that has come with it has eclipsed the good. Your dreams and hopes nearly escaped me. I forgot all but what must be done. No matter the cost. For once I felt truly the pull of truth, the inescapable realization that no matter what comes, truth and wisdom will always be the foundation of this world and I cannot stray from that. Many other thoughts spun through my mind, causing me endless pain and misgiving. My mind slammed out of control but suddenly stopped, leaving me again aware of the battle below.

The sword over you seemed to move in slow motion and I felt myself let out an unconscious scream of passion, echoing the one of rage from Y'ata's own lips. In perfect timing my knife followed Y'ata's blade and pierced through the soft skin of the creature in front of me as his stopped midair. 

The world went black as my quivering knife plunged through the heart of the Ajatair. The air around me seemed empty and unnatural, but I didn't have time to examine the difference before I lost consciousness. 

When I awoke, the world around me was still black and cold. I scrambled down the hillside, feeling my way around and eventually finding myself in what must have been one of the outer caves. 

I stumbled across a still form but didn't pause to examine the harm I had done. The cave was utterly silent and I could not help but wonder if I had died. The dark was so complete that I forced myself to close my eyes for fear of straining them too much. 

I again stumbled against a figure in the dark but this time I stopped. 

"Who's there?" I recognized the voice and could not control the sob that tore through my throat. I put my hands out in front of me and grasped at Gi's arm. He pulled me close and we sank to the cold floor, holding each other, each sniffling back tears and attempting to comfort when comfort does no good. We fell asleep clasped in each others arms, as if determined to never let go. 

When I again awoke, there was a small beam of light from the entrance of the cave and Gi was looking down at me with an idiotic look of love on his beautiful face. A tear rolled down his cheek and his fingers played with my ratted hair. 

"I love you 'Tair." he said, his voice cracking with fatigue. 

"I love you more." I tried to smile but failed miserably, every muscle in my body protesting the small effort. 

Gi was content with that and didn't bother to argue. We huddled closer and drifted off again, anxious for as much sleep as possible before duty should call us. 

 It was some time before I next awoke, having fallen into a sort of comatose state, healthy, but unwilling to be woken. During that time Gi was busy burying the dead and sending groups of men to various places to spread the news of our victory and set things in order. He says he nearly tore his heart out with worry. 

As for the effects of my actions, when I stabbed Weed, I killed the magic of this world. Without the magic, the world went black for a while. All those who had been possessors of power, lost their strength and there were many wounded and dying because of the lack of magic healings. You yourself were in great danger from your many wounds but mostly from your loss of magic. Gi says Ranger was completely out of sorts and he spent a great deal of time by your side so that Gi was forced to attend to many of his duties, all the while wanting to be with me, or so he says. 

When I finally decided to live, Gi was by my side and nearly smothered me to death with his kisses. He pestered me with questions of my side of the battle but I would not give way. The sights, smells, and sounds of that moment were all too clear in my mind and I wanted to be rid of them, as if by ignoring them they would disappear from my past. But I finally got Gi to tell me his part and I could not have been better pleased. To know that my fiance was so worthy of the title "Hero of Kane" did a little to make me forget what I deemed to be my own cowardly actions. 

He was modest in the telling but it was clear that if not for him, we would have lost long before I had killed Weed and thus stopped the fighting.

I could not clear my mind of every thought and feeling during that battle. I spent many hours of solitude, studying my reasoning and searching frantically for some reason to not feel so bad for what I had done.

At length, I urged Gi to recount to me the good and ill caused by the loss of magic and when I heard of you being so near death's door, I longed to go to you but was not allowed the privilege. As Gi told me the terrible things that I had caused, I wanted to rid the world of my miserable existence. I found but little comfort in knowing of Y'ata's demise. 

In those days, my soul was racked with literal eternal torment, wanting to see you, afraid to see you, afraid to show my face to the world I had so harshly treated with my single action. 

Gi was so aware of my every thought and feeling that it was not long before he began to piece together my actions on the hillside. I eventually felt myself compelled to lay before him every detail and he held me close as I struggled to lay it out clearly. The relief I found in my telling was overwhelming. I felt a new closeness to my fiance and I felt that I could again face the world. 

You were still very ill but I had at least gained enough strength to spend a few hours every day doing what little I could to compensate for the actions that only Gi knew I had committed. The aftermath of the battle and doings of Y'ata were gut-wrenching. The surrounding villages and farms were desecrated by the marauding army of the deceased king and we spent many weary hours giving what help and hope we could to the common people while troops of our men searched the countryside for the guilty men. 

My mind was tossing to and fro in anguish at this time, searching for the reason why. I remember vividly standing amidst the rubble of a burned home, the residents wearily picking up the pieces of their lives. I felt the hot tears begin to streak down my face and was startled by a soft touch on my arm. I turned to face the farmer's wife, her soiled apron streaked with ashes and her eyes red with crying. At the look of sorrow and sympathy I gave her, she simply nodded and turned away. 

I felt like shouting my questions of anger to the skies but I knew they would not answer. I attended the small town's meeting that night. They were crowding in a run down barn, the beams across the ceiling swaying precariously in the strong wind. 

I sat myself on an old crate and waited as the last of the villagers shuffled in. The looks of devastation were clear on their faces and I felt my own face crease into the all too natural expression. 

The questions in my head would not be quelled and I felt my anger increase at each grievance recounted.

The room began to grow hot with emotion and I scooted back against the wall as the men arose one by one, voices rising with them. I rose to leave but turned as a soft but firm voice cracked through the shouts.

"Stop." I glanced around and located the speaker, the same farmer woman I had seen that afternoon, standing atop a barrel at the front of the room, her arms spread out and seeming to embrace the room full of people with her very aura. 

"Stop I say." her lilting accent carried around the room and reached into every corner and hiding heart. "Ya hear me? I say stop." There was a moment of theatrical silence. "The lot of you seems to have forgotten what exactly you be doing here. We gathered tonight not to compare woes and wounds, but to plan and to stick together. 

"Farmer Meady, so you lost a cow or two, well so did every other person in this room." Before Meady could protest she held up a hand and continued. "The point is, we got a lot to be grateful for and I suggest we remember that." Her glance fell on me. 

"Warrior I'taira, weren't it the other day you came through here, running fer yer life to get away from that Mage or whate'er he be and his puppet of a king?" I nodded acquiescence. "And weren't it the other day we had a battle on our hands and near to ever' one of you were gathered together with weapons and what not just to keep your heads? And now you be complaining with the head you still got on top your shoulders. 

"Don't ya see? The King is gone and so is his magic. And I say good riddance.  We all have our lands and our families and a new and good King. Don't ya see what we been blessed with? We haven't time to be complaining or fightin'. There's work to be done and we best get doin' it." She ended her words with emphasis and sat down, causing quite a creak on the old barrel. 

A small man near the front stood up and begin to lead the meeting, asking for odds and ends for a family in need and help on a barn raising and whatever else was in need of doing. I left early with the start of a smile on my face. The old woman's words may have not been the equivalent of a sage's, but they were good enough for me and they did their job in knocking some sense and some action into my healing bones. 

 My spirits lightened quickly after that and I was able to push the memory of that horrid day to the far corners of my mind, only to be retrieved in the presence of Gi, when I knew I was not alone. I began to be truly grateful for what good we had accomplished and I noticed little bits of happiness all around. 

 It must have been a full two weeks before you were well enough to be visited by any other than Ranger. I rushed to your side as soon as I was able. To see you lying there, subjected to the pains of this world and without the power and comfort of your magic nearly tore my heart in two. I saw the pain and hurt in your eyes, the confusion at having part of your very being ripped away in an instant. Dearest, it hurt me so to keep myself from telling you everything. But you were so frail and I was so scared and I still curse myself for my cowardice. If only I had told you then and there, perhaps a shorter period of time would have healed our wounds. 

We began to talk and I let myself forget the knowledge pressing on my mind. I was content to spend that precious time alone with you, innocent as to the cause of your pain. 

I thank you in my heart time and again for those weeks of bliss we spent. Your joy on hearing of my engagement nearly outshone my own and oh, the fun we had! Someday I hope to be able to reminisce together, but not now. 

But even your own joy dulled in comparison with the smiles and happy sighs of my own, sweet Gi. He hung about me every moment possible and I remember having to push him out of the room on occasion, just to get a moment alone with you. 

Those few weeks were everything I could ever have hoped for. Friends and family about me, wishing me well, daydreaming and planning my happily ever after. I would not trade that time for anything in the world.

I remember clearly the breathtaking hike up the steep mountainside, the heavenly view beneath my feet as I stood overlooking the lessons of nature. Gi picked that cliff on account of a passing whim of mine but it was perfect. You, me, Gi, and Ranger, with Ranger performing the wedding; what could have been better? And during that beautiful wedding, I did actually dispel the memory of the battle. All I could see and feel was immediately around me and I hadn't a care in the world, but for my husband. 

I am certain you can imagine my feelings at that moment and feel happy for me. When I kissed my new husband I felt a new and better part of myself slip into place. Not as if it had just suddenly appeared, but as if it had only been waiting and growing, readying itself to become part of me at the perfect moment. 

 When we turned to bid you goodbye, my curiosity was aroused at the sight of the four men who had seemingly just appeared behind you. Their green robes seemed to reflect the sunlight back on us and their rubber staffs twisted about with gold ribbon created queer lines of light around my arms.  Their bald heads reminded me of Sol but the look in their eyes was far from Sol's laughing friendliness.

Ranger's voice seemed to echo across the skies as he asked what their intent was on being up there. 

Their initial silence made me wary and I stepped closer to Gi, gaining courage from his nearness. 

When the men stayed silent for several moments, Gi's inquiry echoed Ranger's.

"What do you want here?" still silence. "And if I may be so bold as to ask, who are you? This was to be a private wedding and I don't recall inviting you." He put his arm around me protectively and I smiled up at him. 

The strangers faces were masks of differing emotions and they seemed to take no notice of Gi's words. I felt their eyes on me, huddled as I was, slightly behind Gi's tall figure.

When the leader of the group spoke, I felt my blood turn cold and I leaned closer to my husband. 

The voice may have been pleasant enough, but the words were filled with warnings to my soul and I even saw you tremble a bit. 

"We have come for I'taira." I felt a shiver run up my spine. I could think of nothing to say. The stranger had not used my formal title, which, as you will remember, was officially placed upon me by Ranger a few days before. 

"What do you want with Warrior I'taira?" Gi asked, stressing the word Warrior. 

"I'taira is to be taken before the Mage Council and to be tried." the leader spoke again and his eyes stayed focused on me, scrutinizing my every move.

I saw you stiffen and wondered why, before recalling your recent words to me of a desire to have found more Mages before your power was lost. 

"Mage Council?" your words were nearly lost on me, soft above the pounding of my own heart. 

The leader's head swung towards your small, regal figure and I was grateful for the respite of that harsh glare.

"Mage Ishraina." his bow and respectful glance surprised me and for a moment I had hope of this small group proving to be friendly. I listened carefully to his next words, straining to catch the soft and now almost conversational tone of his voice. 

"The Mage Council sends it's greatest honor and respect. The Council regrets their concealment from one such as yourself but it was necessary. But regardless, they have sent me here to assure you of their future support, such as it may be with their now limited power." His gaze returned to me and I again felt the burning dislike, certain now that however the man may have been to you, I was not to be offered such kindness. 

After moments of being torn through with the strangers eyes, I could stand it no longer. I stood forth, ready to battle to the death if need be. I would not stand for such a disruption on my wedding day. Gi attempted to pull my arm back but I yanked it away, stepping as close as comfort allowed to the leading Mage.

"And who might you be?" my voice dripped with sarcasm but I couldn't stop it. 

I was mad at the respect he showed to yourself when he addressed you in answer to my question. 

"Mage Kynla at your service." his slight bow calmed my anger, reminding me who the queen was here.

"Mage Kynla," my words were mocking as I exaggerated the word mage. "it seems as though the Mage Council hasn't the right, authority, or power to drag me away to some sort of hearing." I saw your posture stiffen and your eyes narrow at my mocking the loss of magic and I am sorry to have hurt you. But my perfect day was being ruined and the guilt that had been brought to the surface of my heart was suffocating the common sense I usually possessed. "What great crime have I committed to catch the attention of the illusive council?"

I made as if to continue but the near animal-like roaring of the the remaining three Mage's stopped the flow of words. Gi quickly stepped in front of me and I feared an all out attack on that dangerous cliff. 

The Mage's calmed and the silence seemed to be nearly tangible, sticking to my still open mouth. 

When you stepped forward I felt my heart lurch and wished with all my might that I had explained things to you before. 

"What has she done?" Your words seemed perfectly rational and calm but I sensed the shaky emotions behind them and I longed to blurt out the whole thing and beg your forgiveness. I tried to but your outstretched hand stopped me, holding me in place. 

"What has she done?" The furious Mages finally seemed to register your words and again I was glad to not be the object of their attentions.

"Mage Ishraina, the Warrior I'taira is responsible for the Undoing." I saw your forehead crease in puzzlement and I wished you could stay innocent of my actions forever. "She has killed the magic." I saw your puzzlement increase. 

Kynla stepped forward, shaking his head at your confusion, he started to speak but then stopped, searching for the right words. Before he could begin his explanation, I felt a new presence behind the four Mages a moment before they did. Sol stepped out from behind the group and walked closer, carefully avoiding eye contact with me. 

Mage Kynla nodded respectfully to Sol and stepped back into his group. I was curious at this acknowledgment of Sol and wondered that he should outrank the mage. 

"I'taira," Finally my teacher's eyes connected with mine and I sensed in them a profound sadness. "Your Majesty," it took me a moment to remember he was addressing you. "Kynla is right. I'taira has killed the magic."

"But how?" Your confusion was still apparent. 

"Raina, in every reign of magic, there must be a Keeper of that magic. Not only a Keeper, there must also be a Holder." Sol chose his words carefully and spoke with all the wisdom of the Sages. But after looking at you and sensing that you understood very little of what he was saying, he threw pretenses to the wind, causing the Mages to sniff the air and stick their obnoxious chins out even further. 

"Oh my lance!" I couldn't help but smile at the old expression my teacher had picked up on. "Just know this, the Ajatair Weed, was known as a Holder of Magic, a source, if you will, of the power of magic. I have been his Keeper, a sort of protector of him. Every millennia or so, an Ajatair dies by another's hand, naturally killing the magic." There was a dramatic pause. "I'taira killed Weed."

It seemed a lifetime that you stood staring into the distance past Sol's shoulder. When you turned to look at me I unconsciously let out a whispered plea of forgiveness. But the hardness in your eyes scared me more than anything I have ever seen and I could not stop myself from taking a step back. 

I do not know why you turned away from me then, but I felt keenly the ripping of my heart. 

Kynla stepped forward again to stand beside Sol. 

"Therefore," he sounded like a stuffy announcer at a ball but the words drove home hard and quick, regardless of the tone in which they were said. "I'taira is to be taken before the Mage Council to be tried and then executed." 

I could not stop the shrill and hysterical laugh from escaping my lips but you still faced away from me. 

"Just like that? It's settled then, set in stone, already confirmed," I would have gone on but for Sol's words covering mine.

"I'taira," His voice sounded like a thunderclap against the darkening valley. "it is decreed and cannot be changed that whoever kills an Ajatair has forfeited their life to the council. It cannot be changed." I searched for any sign of jest in Sol but he was serious and seemed set against me. 

I looked frantically from Gi to Ranger to your turned back. Gi seemed ready to rush forward any moment but I at least had the presence of mind to shake my head, urging him to stay still for at least a moment longer. 

"Sol, please, I have not finished my lessons, I cannot go. You have much to teach me!" I grabbed his arm and searched for any sign of weakening, any sign of help from my mentor. He took me by the hand and his voice was soft enough that it barely reached my ears. 

"No." The one word was the turning point in my hysteria. 

"Why? What did I do wrong? I did everything you told me to! Do you not want to teach me more? I promise to be better and try harder. Please, please, I need you to teach me." I rambled on, not knowing what I was saying. A squeeze on my hand in Sol's quieted me. 

"Little One, I love to instruct," He laughed softly at the understatement. "but I can only teach what is not worth knowing. The real lessons come from your heart. I have only taught you how to listen. You have done the rest." He smiled and I saw a tear on the verge of tumbling down his cheek. I felt a sudden calm and thanked Sol in my heart for his countless hours of rambling, for whatever good they did. 

"Come." Kynla's voice was urgent, bidding me hurry. Sol squeezed my hands one last time and then rambled down the side of the mountain, turning once to wave and smile before disappearing in the dusky light.

I straightened my shoulders and made my way back to Gi's side. I placed my hands in his and after kissing him goodbye, turned to go. 

"Wait!" Gi's voice was shaky but determined. "Give us a moment more. Please." Synla nodded and he and the other Mages walked a few paces off, giving us privacy. 

Gi gestured for me to bid farewell to you and Ranger and I reluctantly let go off his hands. 

When I came to Ranger and he gripped me in a bear hug, I struggled to keep the tears back. "Let her know that I love her." I said, inclining my head to you. "I only tried to do what's right." He nodded and released me. "Take care." I said lastly, he again nodding.

My legs and arms were trembling as I made my way to you, your back still turned to me, staring out into who-knows-where. 

"Raina," I was shocked by your sudden jerk when I touched your shoulder. "please Raina, try to understand." 

"I do understand." Your cold tone made me shudder and my pride made me turn away. "I love you." I don't know if you heard the whisper but you didn't return the sentiment. 

I went to Gi again, determination losing it's hold on me and wanting nothing more than to break down and cry in his arms. But I knew that if I lost my courage then I would never regain it and I couldn't bear to leave me new husband with the memory of my cowardice. 

Gi pulled me into his wonderful arms and hugged me so tightly I felt the breath hasten out of my body. 

"I love you." We both said the words many times over and then Gi held me out by the shoulders and studied my features. 

He looked past me at Ranger and they shared a meaningful look, the meaning then unknown to me. Gi played with the strings of my white cloak, as if he were nervous but I felt him subtly untie them and I noticed that his own cloak hung about his shoulders undone. 

All this while the Mages were keeping a close eye on us, surely not missing the slightest movement. 

Gi pulled me close again and whispered in my ear. "Do you trust me?" 

"What?" My voice was loud and he shushed me. 

"Do you trust me?" 

"Of course, but surely we can establish that fact sometime later." The words trailed off as I remembered there was not to be a "sometime later". 

"Don't let go." His words were crisp and clear and I hung onto him tighter. I noticed that as we hugged he was swaying slighting, moving ever closer to the edge of the cliff. 

I glanced over at Kynla and noticed that he was edging closer, sensing something was amiss. I saw that your tear stained eyes were turned towards us and I mouthed the words "I love you" hoping you would see. 

In the scariest moment of my life, I felt the ground beneath me disappear and I felt myself tumbling through the air, locked in Gi's arms. 

What happened then you could not have seen or guessed. I suppose at that moment and for six years since, you have thought me dead. But the real story is much more exciting. 

 We were caught midflight by the hard back of a dragon, Gi dropping our cloaks to the fatal ground beneath making it look as if our bodies were smashed into the rocks. We nearly slipped off the rather slimly scales but managed somehow to hang on. We careened towards the mountainside and I closed my eyes as we rushed toward certain death. Cool air stifled my breath and when I opened my eyes I found myself still clinging to Gi and the dragon and flying madly through the inside of the mountain.

I laughed aloud and Gi joined me, the sound echoing through the cavernous tunnel, but our laughter was cut short as the dragon curved and we needed all our breath to hang on. 

We flew for what seemed hours and at last came to what I assumed was the other side of the mountain, our exit being through a roaring waterfall that made it even harder to hang on.

We soared over the luscious valley below and the smile on my face was brighter than the rising moon. The dragon landed quite suddenly in a bowl shaped valley surrounded by mountain peaks and sparkling brooks. We slid to the ground and landed in a heap, unable to contain our peals of laughter, letting off the adrenaline rush of the day. 

Gi hopped up and approached the dragon, rubbing it's lowered head and whispering softly to it. The dragon seemed to act much like a dog would, obeying simple voice commands and almost purring as my husband struggled to scratch the hard-to-reach spots on it's back. 

I took the time to study the creature before me and realized that it was almost nothing like those I had read about. It was no taller than a large horse and it's scales were more like ratted fur, seeming misplaced and misshapen around the body. There were large bald spots, especially around it's middle and it had floppy ears that hung slightly past it's chin, wobbling as it rocked it's head.  It's eyes were abnormally large and round, giving it an altogether innocent look. All in all, I liked the look of the creature, albeit, the look was much less dignified than I had expected. 

"What's it's name?" I suddenly asked, realizing I had been thinking of it as an "it". 

Gi looked back and me and smiled, taking a moment to reply. "Benny. He's I'talia's." I cocked my head to the side and raised my eyebrows, showing that I wanted more of an explanation. 

Gi pulled me to my feet and we laughed as we both shook our sopping hair. He put his arm around me and we began to walk.

"Y'ata, through Gioto, had all the dragons "rounded up" a few years back. Rumor was he believed them possessed of some extraordinary powers and he took them captive in order to find it out. He gave too much credit to the storytellers and not enough to the sages and naturalists.

 "When he saw that the dragons were nothing more than overgrown horses with wings, he almost completely destroyed them. He would have if not for I'talia. She bribed some of the guards and got away with two of the animals, one male and one female, hoping to somehow save their race. Little good it did. The female was sickly and soon died, due in part to the torture she suffered at the hands of Y'ata.

"I'talia was heartsick and when Benny became ill, she did all in her power to save him. That was when she took Benk into her confidence. He had been working for the King for some time and she took a chance on trusting him. I suppose that was what planted the seeds of suspicion in him towards the King. He helped the Princess save Benny and she named him in honor of Benk. Benny was what she had teasingly called Benk and I guess it stuck, on both." He smiled and rubbed my arm distractedly.

"I'talia told Ranger about Benny a few weeks ago and he immediately had him brought to the Rebellion and cared for. He came up in one of our conversations and I jumped at the idea. I loved the thought of flying away with you and what better way to travel." We smiled like big idiots and giggled in unison.  

"Wait, so Ranger knows we jumped on Benny?" 

Gi shook his head slightly. "In a way. It was really I'talia that gave me permission but I'm sure he suspected. But I wanted it to be a surprise for all involved. Chances are, he will figure it out, but he can't know for sure. But I don't think he would tell Raina of his suspicions. It would be too hard to not know and too dangerous to try to find out. We'll just have to live with the fact that they think we are both dead." I shivered and he hugged me. 

"Come on, this is our honeymoon. We'll worry about the outside world later." We came to a bend in the beaten path and I gasped. The view before me was so picture perfect that it brought tears to my eyes. 

The moonlight shone softly down on the shingled roof of the small cabin and made the small brook near the back door glimmer as it rolled along. The cabin backed up against the mountain side, seeming small in it's grandeur.

The air was warm and I didn't mind the time we spent on the porch, basking in our perfect love. 

I don't suppose you really want to know about the rest of the honeymoon. Suffice it to say, it was wonderful. When our three weeks ended, we finally sat down together to decide on the rest of our lives. 

We debated and fought some, searching for solutions but they continued to elude us. We could not find a way to go back to you and still keep our heads, or at least mine and Gi claimed he would lose his own if that were the case. 

There was a small town a few miles distant and Gi rode there every so often to replenish our supplies and shower me with gifts. His supply of money came from some investments he had made with Gioto that had providentially been made in his own name. We thought it only fair that Gi receive his payment from all those years of servitude. 

 It is surprising that any news of I'ikane could come to a town so out of the way, but rumor is like a spark to a haystack in this lonesome place and we soon heard every detail of the coronation of King I'iton and the honorary funeral for the "Hero of Kane" was the same week, along with the official banishment of the "Destroyer", me. 

 I am flattered at the honor you thought fit to bestow my husband but it is not so flattering to be banished, especially when you are thought to be dead. Did your Mage Council fear my spirit would stay to haunt them?

At the time the news came as a bitter shock and I was down in the mouth for some while. Now I see the whole thing as slightly comical, knowing that it has turned out so well, but it didn't seem very funny in the moment. 

I now ask, why? What made you banish me and refuse me a funeral? I am sure the story must be hilarious and I am anxious to hear it. 

 We continued to debate long and hard about our situation, so long that I found myself with child before the end of it and Gi refused to even talk about moving until the baby was born. Well, babies would be more accurate. A boy and a girl, each adorable in their own way. I was deliciously happy and had quite forgiven you by that time. 

So, in a nutshell, here's my life's story since then. Gi and I settled down in the small cabin by the stream, enlarging it as our family grew, near a small town called Betna in the kingdom over your mountain known as Deja. The Deji have never heard of Mages or Sages or even dragons unless speaking of the kingdom over the mountain called I'ikane and then in nothing past a cynical view of such tales.  But it has not been difficult to conceal Benny in the bounteous forest near us. We had considered sending the little fellow home, certain it would cause I'talia heartache at not knowing him safe, but decided against it, as it would most likely give us away. We hope to perhaps find remnants of a dragon herd and keep the dragons alive through Benny.

We felt compelled to change our names, as we knew the people to know of the "Hero of Kane", Gi Medo and the "Destroyer", your humble servant I'taira. Gi goes by Gi'f now, so it is not totally strange for me to shorten it to Gi. I go by Tairyn, so again, it is safe for my husband to call me Tair. 

The twins are not yet five, Tonny, named after Ranger and Father, at least in a fashion, is a little angel. He is thoughtful and sweet, always picking the right times to help me. Rayna, on the other hand, seems out to kill me. We named her after our little Raina but unfortunately, she has none of your goodness and all of your faults. She begs constantly to hear about her Auntie Raina, insisting we tell the same stories again and again though she must know them word for word by now. We have been careful to keep the children from knowing the real identities of their Auntie and Uncle but I fear what will happen when they grow old enough to understand what we talk about late into the night. 

I have three other children, one more set of twins and a newborn. 

Aberey and Terken are three going on thirty. They can come up with the most complex and terrifying plans and carry them through in perfect synchronization. I don't know how their young minds grasp the things they do and I am afraid I have two little genius' on my hands. Two boys together is a scary thing.

As for the little one, can I help but say he is my favorite? 

 Little Kale is my treasure. He is a small child, smaller than the rest have been at least. He rarely cries and when he does it is never something that can't be fixed with a kiss and a treat.  He loves to cuddle but is not a needy child. He will be a sweet-tempered and easy going boy and a huge relief compared to the rest of my rascals. 

My children are my joy and treasure and I could write for hours, expounding on their virtues and vices. I suppose you could do the same of your little girl. It was only this year that I even heard of your little princess and I was shocked to hear that she is older than my Rayna. I am so sad that I could not celebrate her birth with you. 

As for what is to happen now that you know of my living so near, I have decided it would be best to go on as we ever have. I long to see you with all my heart, and you are so close, just over the mountain. But I fear greatly the danger it would bring to us all.

As a side note, I am very pleased with your decision to stay near the Rebellion Caves. When I heard Ranger was going to be King, I was sick thinking of him cooped up in that stuffy old palace. It is wiser to be nearer the people and in a more friendly position, albeit one that you would have not trouble defending. The nearest kingdom is Deja and I myself can assure you, you have very little to ever fear from the Deji. They are small and all too relaxed. I doubt that they even have the means to protect themselves against an attack of vicious birds. 

My life is comfortable and happy. The only thing that sneaks up to haunt me from my past is the Mage Council. When I heard they had stationed themselves in your palace, that was the last straw. There is certainly no way I can return. If they knew I was alive, I am certain they would maliciously seek my destruction. 

That is why I feel it best that things stay the way they are. But I could not bear to be silent any longer. And I have the most splendid idea. I thought that my little Rayna and your little girl (what is her name?) could correspond through letters as we used to when we were apart. There aren't many little girls around for Rayna to play with and I would dearly love her to know her cousin, at least in a fashion. She is just learning her letters and I could always help her when she needs it. Just be sure your little girl doesn't mention the whole royalty thing. There's no saying how Ray would react to that. I am afraid I don't have the means or time to treat her like the princess her cousin is and I wouldn't want her getting jealous. 

Gi provides for us as best he can. He is being hired like crazy all around to train horses and even teach some of the various lords children to ride. But times can be tough. But don't you dare send charity. If we ever really need it you know I will ask. We do just fine as we are. 

Now that we no longer have the use of magic for the sending of our letters, I thought we could use Benny. There is that pass through the mountain and perhaps you could entrust someone with retrieving the letters from the cliff side. I know it is a bit dangerous but I certainly cannot keep sending you letters through the normal route. That would take ages and there is too much a chance of someone tampering with them. 

This one will of course have to go the normal way but if you feel so inclined to reply, I will send Benny to the cave mouth at exactly noon every T'uesday. 

My dearest little sister, I miss you with all my heart and I ache at the thought of how we have grown apart. But I hope someday for a complete reconciliation and for the meeting of our two families. We still have much to discuss and I wait impatiently for your reply. 

Will you ever forgive me? Have you? 

  Yours with eternal love,

         I'taira 

38

Dear I'taira,

I long to see you. I miss you so much, and even more now that you are here at the rebellion. I'm so frustrated that I can't see you. We're so close, yet we're so far. I want to be with Ranger so much but it's not to be. At least for right now. I long to meet Gi now that he isn't under Y'ata's spell. Ranger has written me a letter telling me how close you two are. He said that if you two aren't married by the end of the rebellion then he might order you two married. He is so happy to be with Gi again. I'm sorry if he bores you with questions about me and talking about me. Ranger himself admitted that he thinks of little else besides me. I tell him that he is likely to drive all of you insane, but he says you are all content because your all so busy with your loved ones.

I want to be there so bad with all of you. I want to be in the middle of the action. But as you probably know I'm stuck learning spells and perfecting them. Bud even left me a list of spells to study while she's gone. I try to show nothing but pleasure for Luc and Bud's wedding and honeymoon but I must admit that I long to have a honeymoon with my husband. After all we are both working harder than most any one here . . . . That wasn't very nice of me to say. I really miss Ranger though. I lay at night and can't think of anything else but him. Why is it that when we decide to love each other and get married we never see each other. It's not that I'm unhappy I just wish I could be there with him. Helping and supporting him.

Bud made me so mad when she told me she was going to get married and it was at a time that I couldn't go. She felt awful about it but what could she have done? I wanted to be there so badly. Not only to see you, Gi and Ranger. I wanted to congratulate Bud and Luc personally. I wanted to support my new friend. This is all very disappointing for me. At least you were there.

If any one, and I mean any one, gives you trouble just tell me and I'll be there. Most every one in the rebellion has seen me fight and they know that any one who goes against me will lose. Especially now that I have Bud's new spells. I know so much. I have learned such powerful spells that I no longer fear facing Y'ata. I will be able to give him a fight worth remembering. After all Y'ata did kill our father. I think he must have cheated in that fight or something. But again our father didn't have foresight. I can feel the magic flow through me so easily right now. It is such a strange feeling. Abe is very nice. He trys to be interested in my spells but I can tell that his mind is constantly on Emlyn. He does a good job guarding me but he really has nothing to guard me from. Today Benk and I'talia dropped by. They really are very sweet. I'talia is a funny girl. At first our conversation was very uncomfortable and stressed but it started to ease once I asked about you. She thinks the world of you. It was so nice to talk to a normal girl again. Bud is always talking like a Sage who can't stop talking and then she'll make a mistake then explain why she did it wrong, thereby sounding like a accident prone girl. I think Bud is the most interesting person. Don't get me wrong, I do care for her. Then Emlyn is always so serious and calm. I'talia is full of conversation. She told me how happy she was that Ranger married a girl who was going to be able to take care of her self. She also said that I was probably the only person in the world who would suit Ranger. I had to agree with her of course. Then she looked at Benk with a small shy glance.

And then she started to thank me for kidnapping her. I was some what shocked, I mean I wasn't exactly nice to her. Then she reached out and held Benk's hand. "If you hadn't kidnapped me I would never of had a chance to fall in love with Benk," I'talia said. I looked from I'talia to Benk then back to I'talia. "Your married then?" I asked. They both smiled and nodded. "Congratulations!" I said, "Though I knew you were married. You both should have told me earlier." They looked at each other a little guiltily. I laughed. I now see why you are so sick of people getting married. But I'talia and Benk did sat that they see you and Gi being married soon. You know that you love him and that he is perfect for you. Benk and Abe have been talking while I've been writing to you. I'talia has been out to see Bud's cave garden. I will have to write later because I'm going to walk the two married couple past the closest selling area.

Later:

I can't write very much. I have to leave. I saw Master S'oturi! He told me the gravest of news. An army is sneaking towards the rebellion and has gone unnoticed. They are not a three days walk from the rebellion!

I have to calm down and finish this letter. I don't know how Master S'oturi got past the guards but he did. He pulled me aside into an alley away from the busy shopping street, and a place where Abe couldn't find us quickly. Master S'oturi looked me up and down. "You look the same as always," he said. "I hear I am to congratulate you on your marriage to Ranger." I nodded. I didn't trust Master S'oturi. He was using a tone of voice that I didn't like. But I assure you he was under no spell. "Raina," he said, "I have come to warn you that Y'ata and an army of over five-thousand men are on their way to the rebellion." He let that sink in before continuing. "I can't believe you are all at ease here. It will be easier for Y'ata to kill you all then I thought," he said. "YOU KNOW NOTHING!" I yelled at him.

He laughed and started to walk away. "Wait," I called after him and he turned around. "Aren't you going to help us fight?" "Why?" he asked. I was confused. First he comes and tells me we are soon to be under attack then he refuses to fight. "With all possibilities considered," he said, "the rebellion will fall and you will all be crushed. I do not see why I should fight for a lost cause." "It's not a lost cause!" I said. "You always had faith," S'oturi said. "But when Y'ata comes you will be the first one he kills. With Y'ata coming here you have no chance of surviving." "What do you suggest I do?" I asked. "Raina as an old master counseling a young apprentice I would tell you to lead Y'ata away from the rebellion. If he comes here then he will ruin any sort of idea or attack strategy you have planed," he said. "But if you leave he will follow you. He wants you dead more than any one else here in the rebellion, except for your husband. If Y'ata is lead away then the rebellion might stand a chance. I have no more suggestions for you. Farewell. If you die I will make sure you have a nice grave stone." And he walked off.

I stood in shock. This is what I have been dreading, I didn't want this to happen. I didn't move until Abe appeared at the head of the alley with his sword drawn he walked up to me and asked if I was alright. Abe's words woke me up from my stupor. I ran from the alley with Abe close behind me. That's when I started writing. Abe doesn't even know what is going on. I decided that I needed to write to you so that I wouldn't die because of confusion, and because I'm in such a rush. Now that I have written all of this down I will be able to think more clearly. I'm going to send Abe with this letter to you. And I will also tell Abe what is going on.

Sister I love you, I want you to know that. I also need you to comfort Ranger. Explain to him that I had to go, it would have been harder for me if I stopped to say good bye, it will be more fitting this way. Make sure that all the preparations for war are made, and that all the children and most of the women are sent deeper into the caves. I long to see you before I leave but I wont be able to. I will be sending you short updates of the battle between me and Y'ata. Please don't write back to me, not now, I couldn't bare it. If we should never meet again please watch out for Ranger, and I . . . I can't write any more, this will be the death of me if I keep writing to you.

Good bye,

Raina


It has been less than a day since I last wrote to you. I was able to get past H'lafa by the time Y'ata caught up to me and we started to fight. In Mage's fights you fight only when there is light and you take a break at night to ready yourself for the next battle. We are at that point right now. I'm doing better than Y'ata expected of me. He keeps telling me how our father died. He's trying to provoke my anger. I can't be brought down to his level, that would ensure my death. Bud's spells are a marvelous help. Please thank her for me. And tell Ranger that- I love him.


It's been another hard day of fighting. Y'ata has pushed me back about a days worth of the journey. He's driving me towards the rebellion. We should arrive there in probably another day. I try hard to escape him sister and push him back, I really do. He wont let me go any other direction. He wont let me lead him away from the rebellion. Sister prepare your selves. I don't know how much longer this will last.


SISTER! WE ARE ABOUT AN HOUR FROM THE REBELLION. I'VE MANAGED TO GET AWAY FOR A FEW SECONDS TO WRITE THIS. PREPARE EVERYONE. WE'RE ALMOST THERE. I'LL TRY TO DETAIN Y'ATA AS LONG AS I CAN BUT I DON'T THINK I CAN GIVE YOU MORE THAN A FEW HOURS. PRAY THAT WE'LL LIVE THROUGH TODAY AND THAT THE SKY WILL HOLD HER TEARS TILL AFTER WE'RE DONE WITH THIS MESS.

Now I either go to death or ruin. I will always love you sister. And tell Ranger that I know now that I could never have been happy with any body else but him. And tell him simply . . . that I really do love him.

Ishraina